A group of moms in our ward were going to Tysons Mall to take their kids to meet Santa Claus there, and apparently "Everybody's always known that the best Santa is at Tysons," at least that's what it says in the news. This is a topic worth divulging.
A little background. This guy gets paid $175 an hour to have kids sit on his lap, maybe say what they want for Christmas, scream, get a token photo with the big bearded man, and take off. For his 5 week contract, that comes to a total of $30,000. In 5 weeks! To be Santa!! You've got to be kidding me. The mall tried to end his contract this year (
see this article), so he sued them of course (welcome to DC, right?) followed by launching a massive campaign to get his contract back. Apparently he had quite the fanbase, compiled from thousands of people bringing their kids for the last 18 years to see this guy, traveling from as far as California to provide consistency for their kids (....really??). But go ahead and take a deep breath, you can all relax now and know that he has "been saved by thousands of fans who phoned, e-mailed, petitioned and threatened a boycott until the mall reversed its plan to boot him," (
see this article), and this celebrity Santa is back in business. BIG sigh of relief.
So of course in the line for seeing Mr. Famous Santa, right before you take your tike up to the scary man in the red suit, the happy child-prepping men come to inform you of the fine print.
Elf man: This is a little one! So precious and small! Ma'am, I just need to make sure you know that there is a one-purchase minimum of a photo package in order to see Santa. {p.s. the cheapest package is $20}
Me: Oh, there is? Ummm...but can we take our own pictures with a personal camera?
Elf man: Well, I'm not going to yell and you and chase you away if you do.
Me: Oh good! But there is a one purchase minimum? Enforced?
Elf man: Uh, I mean, it's recommended.
Me: Ohhhhh,
it's
recommended. Gotcha. {permission granted :) }
Being somewhat skilled at reading between the lines, after I handed off the little man to a bunch of strangers, I busted out the point-and-shoot, took some terrible pictures in attempt to be quick and not make a scene while trying to keep Van's hat down so he didn't look like a Canadian stepping off the set of Strange Brew, and talked my way out of making a purchase by explaining to the nice lady behind the counter that my husband had no idea I was there (true), and that he wouldn't be impressed if I came home announcing that I'd spent so much money on a photo for our clueless baby with Santa (doubly true). No hard feelings, she let me off the hook. As you can see from my own photo, Van's blank stare and Santa's awkwardness holding him would hardly validate any one-purchase minimum. Next year I call we're dressing Jon up and taking some freebie photos without the guilt trip.
Maybe I should feel guilty, but I don't. He just sued so he could get his $175/hr contract back, he's not hurting. Although maybe the mall is...